How to Create a Mini Retreat at Home (No Booking, No Packing Required)
In corporate life, I became thirsty, very very thirsty, for my weekend. As an introvert AND empath, this time was absolutely mission critical for filling my batteries.
Each segment of the weekend became a flavour: Friday night - complete exhale, kick shoes off, eat too much, stay up late, day dream, play pretend the weekend stretches out forever. Saturday - fancy free, local adventures, my life is my own, I am awake and alive and full of gratitude.
But then the tone would shift dramatically on Sunday. must. get. the. house. comprehensively. clean. Must batch cook. Must get to bed on time. Must be ready for Monday morning meetings. Must get in an hour of yoga because I haven't all week. Must have family time.
At first I started asking myself, what exactly do I want to "acheive" over my weekend so it doesn't feel like a waste? It always felt like it slipped away from me, and I wanted to “own” it more. Conversely, this actually ended up being more pressure to also perform on weekends, and I think I lost months to that framework.
Extra exhausted from this, out of exasperation, next I started asking - what do I need from my weekend? And the answer was: more exhale. More space. And once I started feeling roomy again in my weekend, I understood that the question was even more simple, and didn't need to just apply to weekends - "what do I need?" period.
This space I needed, that was the Intention… with a capital I. That was my guiding light. And with that intention being clear, I could create something to support it.
Now, I love lying prone on the floor staring at the ceiling as much as the next yoga girlie. Probably more. I really love lying on the floor, lol!
But what about a more yang-style rest? Not Sunday night, the last 20 minutes before lights out. I wanted something to organize myself around, to busy myself with, and feel like I had something TANGIBLE to come away with (which, I think, was the original inspiration behind that first question, about coming away from weekends with an acheivement). I actually need to feel constructive in my rest. My brain and hands need to be engaged. In essence, making rest an engaging activity.
There is something very extravagant and lovely and deeply nourishing about planning an intentional pause for yourself, from home, a real self-guided retreat, without putting up all the unnecessary difficulties around getting out of town, and the busyness, push, and additional stress. Just cut right to the goods!!
Scratching The Itch
Lying on the floor is the berries. If you haven't tried it, get thee a good playlist. Here is one I am really enjoying: The Mercy of The Wind Radio on Spotify.
But to feel like you got a brownie badge for getting something useful and memorable done this weekend, while also filling your tank - here's a little Rx for you. This is designed so that you are also speaking to and supporting the part of you that likes to take action, to be engaged, to feel the benefit of the things you do. Because lying on the floor is really great, but it is certainly not the whole picture of comprehensive rest and restore. Give this a try, and see the difference between just thinking about self care and throwing a couple of tasks at it, or going ahead and making it a fun and adventurous priority.
Two Things to Hold Front and Centre:
You are unique and amazing, and you have activities that will be the right notes to fill your at-home retreat symphony. Let your return to this practice help you to refine, explore, change, expand, and wild with this.
Your Intention is unique and amazing. Allow your own intention to be refined with this process. Mine started as “to create more space for myself”, but it keeps evolving. Yours will probably start with something similar to "Taking some constructive time to myself". But what is fun here, is that once you start clearing this room for yourself, making this a priority, and something fun, you might find there are other inspirations you want to reinforce, such as "Self care is easy and delightful", "I love treating myself", and more. I would be interested to hear in the Intentions you discover!
The Plan
If you went out of town for the weekend, you'd plan it. A mini retreat is as effective as its container.
What’s Your Timing?
Start by deciding on how much time you're retreating for. Same as you would if you went out of town for the weekend. Do you leave on Friday night to be home for bed on Sunday, tossing all the laundry on the floor for later in the week? Or is this an afternoon adventure, complete with a picnic? I.e. - are you taking all weekend, or just a segment of it? Perhaps a weekday night is the best for you?
Decide when you're "departing" and when you're "home." Giving your retreat a real time boundary is what makes it feel like a retreat instead of just a free afternoon.
Brainstorm Your Activities
What sort of activities feel like a departure from the weekly routine? Is there an essay you have been wanting to write just for yourself, or a bath bomb to try? Do a brainstorm on the things that would truly delight you and make you feel like Christmas morning and beach retreat all at once. Dream big, let the writing of the list in and of itself be a joyful inquiry into what makes you zing. Oh! We will need another playlist for this - reach for your favourite dreamy tunes.
Curate, Don’t Cram.
There is a quote from R.R. Stutman that I am obsessed with: "If perfectionism is an obstacle course, than excellence is a masterful dance." Bring together your retreat masterfully. Choose the activities that sing together. Create a magnum opus - just for you, the things that will fill YOU up.
Shop Your Own Home
The coloured pencils and adult colouring book, the super fancy journal, the special chamomile tea that never gets drunk, maybe a champagne flute for your retreat beverage? Here is where we rediscover our interests and take delight in them again.
Set Your Space
Blankets, lighting, a good window? Diary, candles, tea kettle, knitting supplies, speakers for your chosen playlist? Love yourself extra by doing some cleaning, organizing and decluttering around this space, so it feels free, light and easy when you arrive. Can you put something away in a closet or drawer that may hook in thoughts of work or other responsibiliites, such as a laptop? Can you bring out something unique, like a piece of art you had closetted? Have some snacks and beverages prepared?
Review
When are you "departing?" What needs to be ready and organized in order for you to be fancy free? Can you plan a meal, or will cooking be a retreat activity? Either way, what is the menu and recipe? When do you need to be back by? Do you need to notify anyone or hang a "do not disturb" sign?
Let’s Go
And now hold yourself to it. I have been Queen, in the past, of feeling that the chores were more important, or other people's priorities, batch cooking. I, detached from your justifications, playfully invite you to question each excuse, sorting into two piles - show stopper or imaginary roadblock. I have come to discover that having fun, filing up my tank, staying connected to myself, is the only way for me to have any kind of hope of keeping my sense of humour with all. the. other. things.
And then sit back and enjoy the rest of the week knowing that you are Captain of Your Own Retreat.